Teaching Children Piety

The spirituall good of children, and that in their childhood, is to be procured by parents as well as their temporall. Wherefore Parents must traine vp their children in true piety. This is expresly commanded in my text vnder this phrase admonition of the Lord. Vnder the law God did both simply [Note 1] command it, and that very often, and also ordained diuers outward [Note 2] rites, and caused many visible and extraordinary [Note 3] monuments to be set vp, that thereby children might be occasioned to aske of their parents the mysterie of them, and that parents from that inquirie of their children might take occasion to [Note 4] teach them the ordinances of the Lord.

This expresse charge of the Lord is further commended by that practise which holy parents from time to time haue yeelded thereunto: instance the examples of [Note 5] Abraham, [Note 6] Dauid, [Note 7] Bathsheba, [Note 8] Lois and Eunice, with many others.

1.Pietie is the best thing that a parent can teach his childe: for as reason maketh a man differ from a beast; and as learning and ciuilitie maketh a wise and sober man differ from sauages and swaggerers; so pietie maketh a sound Christian much more to differ from the most ciuill and well ordered naturall man that can be. Learning, ciuilitie, calling, portion, are all nothing without pietie. Now it is an especiall point of wisdome, to seeke the best good that we can, as for our selues, so also for our children: yea this is an euident signe of a parents true loue of his childe.#

2.There is a necessitie that children be taught pietie, because [Note 9] they are not borne but made Christians: by nature they are vtterly destitute of all pietie: for by nature euery imagination of the thoughts of mans heart is only euill continually (Gen. 6. 5.) and in that respect man is borne like the wilde asse colt (Iob#

11.12.) so as a man were better be vnborne then not taught pietie.#

3.The charge and office of parents bindeth them to teach their [Note 10] children pietie: for they are by God made watchmen ouer their children: if therefore their children liue and die in impietie through their parents negligence, their bloud shall be required at their parents hands: instance the example of [Note 11] Elie.#

Obiect. This dutie appertaineth to Ministers. [Note 12] Answ.

1.God hath giuen an expresse charge hereof to parents, as we heard before.#

2.In the familie a parent is all in all ouer his childe: a King, a Priest, and a Prophet. Therefore that which a Minister is to doe for matter of instruction in the Church, a parent must do at home. 3 Children haue need of daily instruction: the parents paines in this kinde must be added to the Ministers: and both are little enough.#

4.Parents hauing more familiaritie with their children then Ministers, must needs better know their capacitie, and their disposition: and so may better know after what manner to instruct them: whether to giue them milke or strong meat, whether to deale mildly or roughly with them.#

5.Instructions from parents are commonly more kindly accepted then from others: and children will the better rellish them, when they come from their parents. They say that a plant will best grow in the soile out of which it first sprung: so instructions comming from those who both brought vs forth, and first brought vs vp, are like to doe most good.#

6.There is no such meanes to breed loue in a childs heart, as to be an instrument of bringing piety thereinto. Now who should more seeke the true loue of a childe then a parent? In this respect a parent is more bound to this dutie then a Minister.#

7.It is impossible, that a Minister, who, it may be, hath many hundred children vnder his charge, should well instruct them all: It is therefore requisite, that each parent looke to his owne children. As these distinct answers satisfie the obiection, so they serue as so many more reasons to inforce the dutie: wherefore to proceed in adding other reasons,#

4.Great equitie there is that parents teach their children piety, [Note 13] because they [Note 14] conceiued and brought them forth in iniquitie. If they suffer them to lie and die in that corrupt estate, they are more cruell then the Ostrich and Dragon.#

5.Children are most properly Gods: [Note 15] borne to God: he is the [Note 16] most proper parent of them: in comparison of God, fathers and mothers of the flesh are but nurses. They must therefore nurture them in the admonition of the Lord.#

6.Pietie is that, which of all other things, will make the childe [Note 17] most obedient, and gratefull to his parents: for thus there is a double bond to binde him:#

1.his birth.#

2.his new birth: especially when the cause of the one hath beene also the cause of the other.#

7.Nothing can more settle the heart of a wise parent on his [Note 18] death-bed concerning his children, then assurance that pietie is planted in them: for then may he with stronger confidence commend them to Gods prouidence, and with greater assurance expect his blessing vpon them after he is dead.#

8.Parents, by teaching their children pietie, are an especiall [Note 19] meanes of propagating true religion from age to age, and from generation to generation. No better meanes can be thought of. For if all parents were carefull of their dutie in this kinde, as there is a succession of children, and thereby a preseruation of mankinde, so there would be a succession of those that feare God, and thereby a preseruation of true religion. My children that are taught by me, may be fathers of children, and so teach that to their children, which they haue learned of me: yea after them may grandchildren proue fathers of other children, and they teach their children the same, and so from age to age others after them. This is the meanes on our part: and in our time we must doe our part: and for those who come after vs, leaue the issue to God. Not only the great benefit of this point, but also the too much neglect thereof, in most families, hath moued me the longer to insist on it, and the more forcibly to presse it. For the better performing thereof, I will adde some directions.#

1.Whatsoeuer principle of pietie, parents doe teach their children, [Note 20] they must be sure that it be grounded on Gods word: thus much this phrase (admonition of the Lord) implieth.#

Thus shall parents be sure to feed them with good wholesome spirituall food, such as shall make to their spirituall nourishment, and eternall life. In this respect principles of religion grounded on Gods word are called sound, or wholsome, or healthfull words: [Note 21] and that both in regard of their matter and substance, and also in regard of their effect; they cause and preserue good, sound, spirituall health. We know that naturall men haue a care to giue their children such food as is wholsome for their bodie: (for will a father [Note 22] that is euill, giue his childe a stone, or a serpent, and not that which is good?) Conscience must moue religious parents, to haue the like care of the soules of their children, as nature teacheth all parents to haue of their bodies. If parents be carefull to draw those principles, wherein they instruct their children, out of Gods word, they shall be sure not to poyson their soules with any error, heresie, superstition, or idolatrie.

2.When children begin to read, let them read the holy Scripture: [Note 23] so was Timothie trained vp from a childe (2 Tim. 3. 15.) Thus will children sucke in religion with learning: for there is a secret vertue lurking in the holy Scripture (which is Gods owne word) more then in any bookes of men: so as through Gods [Note 24] blessing there may by this meanes be an inward worke of grace in children euen in their young yeeres. Besides, no bookes are more easie then many parts of Scripture; and no histories more admirable and delightfull, then the histories of the Scripture. It is the aduice of an ancient Father, that young children be made acquainted with the words and names of holy Scripture: and that, in stead of tales and fables, choice histories of the Bible be made knowne to them: and that they be instructed in the Prouerbs of Solomon.#

3.Let children be catechised constantly from day to day: rehearse them continually vnto thy children, saith the Law. That which is daily done, is in Scripture said to be done continually: as the sacrifice which was daily offered was called a continuall offering. Here let this caueat be noted, that in giuing this spirituall food, parents deale with their children, as skilfull nurses and mothers doe in feeding infants: they will not at once cram more into their mouthes, then their stomach is able to digest, but they will rather oft feed them with a little: so it is not meet, that parents be too tedious; that will but dull a childs vnderstanding, and breed wearisomnesse, and make it loath to be againe instructed: but precept vpon precept, precept vpon precept, line vpon line, line vpon line, [Note 25] here a little, and there a little. Thus shall they learne with case and delight: and this being oft performed, in time a great measure of knowledge will be gained thereby. If a vessell haue a little mouth, we vse not to fill it by powring whole paile-fuls vpon it, for so all may be spilt, and it receiue little or nothing: but we let the liquor fall in by little and little, according to the capacitie of the mouth; so is nothing lost, and the vessell filled the sooner. Thus are children to be dealt withall.#

4.To the set times of catechizing children, let other occasions [Note 26] of teaching them pietie be added: as at table, by resembling the spirituall food of their soules, to that corporall food, whereby their bodies are nourished: when they are walking abroad, by shewing them the starres, how they remaine stedfast in their course; the trees, how they bring forth fruit in their season; how all things are for the vse and benefit of man, and thereupon make spirituall vses: note the direction which for this purpose the Law giueth to parents, Thou shall talke to thy children of my words, [Note 27] when thou sittest in thine house, and when thou walkest by the way, and when thou liest downe, and when thou risest vp.#

5.Let parents open to their children the mysteries of those [Note 28] outward rites which God hath ordained in his Church, as of Preaching, Baptising children, administring the Lords Supper, ceasing from worke on the Lords day, with the like. This was expresly commanded vnder the law. Visible rites are great helpes to the weake vnderstanding of children, when they are plainly opened and applied: yea they are also especiall meanes of keeping in memory the mysteries contained vnder them: as course threds or wiars are meanes to preserue pearles put vpon them. So oft as they see the rites they will be put in minde of the mysteries implied vnder them.#

6.To this may be referred a declaration of such great and [Note 29] admirable workes as God in former times hath done for his Church: especially such workes as haue beene done in their time: and if any memorials be remaining of them, make them knowne to children. This direction was also giuen vnder [Note 30] the law, concerning the monuments which were set vp of the great deliuerances that God gaue to his people. In particular when the day of the gunpowder-treason is solemnized, parents ought to teach their children the occasion of solemni ⟦G3⟧ing that day. And as God doth any great workes of mercy ⟦G4⟧r of iudgement, point them out to children. When there is great famine, plague, or any mortality, instruct children in ⟦G5⟧he causes thereof: when victory, plenty, peace, or the like, ⟦G6⟧ach children from whence these come. Outward sensible things doe best worke vpon children.#

7.Let religious schoole masters be chosen for children: so ⟦G7⟧ewise [Note 31] other masters to whom children are put forth: and religious houses where they are placed. Hannah commended ⟦G8⟧er first borne childe to old Eli, a good, religious high Priest. [Note 32] ⟦G9⟧ ⟦G10⟧ ⟦G11⟧ masters themselues be religious, there is good hope that they will instruct in piety such as are vnder them: which if they ⟦G12⟧oe, what an helpe will that be to parents? If both parents and masters ioyne therein, it must needs be very profitable to ⟦G13⟧e children. If parents should faile, yet might masters make a ⟦G14⟧ood supply.#

8.Let parents be to their children a good patterne and example [Note 33] in pietie. I and my house (saith [Note 34] Iosua) will serue the Lord: he setteth himselfe first as a guide to the rest. [Note 35] I will walke in mine house with a perfect heart, saith Dauid, whereby he would make himselfe an example, as to others of his family, so to his children. Example is a reall instruction, and addeth a sharpe edge to admonition. Much more shall a religious parent doe by practise then by precept. For children are much inclined to follow their parents: let them goe before, children will soone follow after. Practise is an euident proofe of the necessitie of the precept deliuered.#

Many are the aberrations contrary to the forenamed care of teaching pietie. For

1.Most parents care only for the temporall and ciuill good of their children: so their children may be well fed and clothed, and brought vp in some profitable calling, whereby they may well maintaine themselues in this world, little thought is [Note 36] had, or care taken for their spirituall life in this world, or eternall life in the world to come. Wherein are these parents better then heathen? Iob was otherwise minded: he was more carefull for their soules then for their bodies.#

2.Many are so farre from teaching piety, as they teach their children profanenesse, pride, riot, lying, deceit, and such like principles of the deuill. It had beene better for such children to haue liued among wilde beasts, then vnder such parents. As the children hereby are thrust headlong to hell, so their blood shall be required of their parents.#

3.Others thinke it enough that their children be taught a religion, but what religion it skilleth not. Such are they as hauing rich kindred but popish, commend their children to the education of such kindred, in hope of some temporall benefit, that their children may reape from them. If they were as carelesse of their childrens bodies, they would be accounted little better then murtherers: and is not the soule more pretious then the body?#

4.So farre are many from catechising their children and that daily, as they teach them not so much as the Lords praier, the Beleefe, and the ten Commandements. Wherein Papists shall rise vp in iudgement against them, that are very diligent in teaching their children, Pater noster, Aue Maria, and such like Latine principles, as the children cannot possibly vnderstand.#

5.Few vse the forenamed outward helpes, as the holy rites appointed of God, the great and glorious workes of God, his extraordinary workes of mercy or iudgement, to instruct their children thereby. As they themselues care not to take notice of any such thing, so they care not whether their children doe it or no.#

6.So much doe some preferre a little pelfe before the true [Note 37] good of their children, as they care not to what schoolemaster they put their children, be he profane, or popish, or vnlearned, especially if he be a kinsman, or one of their friends. Few will so doe in case of their health or outward estate: but will rather get the best Physitian, or the best Lawyer that they can. Children oft learne such euill qualities of their schoolemasters as they can neuer shake off againe.#

7.Many proue very bad patternes to their children, and giue very ill example by profanensse, riotousnesse, swearing, drinking, playing at vnlawfull games, &c. These parents as they brought forth their children in sinne, so they lead them on forward to hell. Their euill example is not only an hinderance to the good instruction of others, but also maketh all their owne counsells (if at any time they doe giue any good counsell) to be in vaine: for the left hand of euill example [Note 38] soone pulleth downe more then the right hand of instruction can build againe.#

To conclude, those parents whose children are not brought vp in the instruction of the Lord, shew plainly that they regard neither the saluation or damnation of their soules.

Hitherto of the Kindes of nurture. The Time thereof followeth.

In handling the time of [Note 39] good nurture, I wil shew

1.When it ought to be begun.;#

2.How long it ought to be continued#

1.Parents ought to begin to nurture their children so soone as they are capable of any instruction. Euen as young birds are taught by their dammes to flie so soone as their wings can carry them. [Note 40] Traine vp a childe (saith Solomon) that is, while he is young and tender: and againe, [Note 41] He that loueth his childe nurtureth him be times. Thus was Samuel sent when he was very young to be trained vp vnder Eli, (1 Sam. 1. 24.) and Solomon was instructed by his father when he was tender, (Pro.#

4.3.) and Timothy was taught the Scriptures [Note 42] from a young childe, or infant.#

There are both priuatiue, and positiue reasons to presse this point. Priuatiue, in regard of the mischiefes that may be preuented thereby. Positiue, in regard of the good that may be gained thereby.

1.Many are the euils which children by nature are prone vnto, euen as ranke ground is subiect to bring forth many weeds: for [Note 43] the imagination of mans heart is euill from his youth: and [Note 44] foolishnesse is bound in the heart of a childe. If therefore they be not well nurtured betimes, what can be looked for, but the fruits of euill, and folly. But timely nurture will preuent such fruits, and be an excellent preseruatiue against their owne naturall corruption, against Satans temptations and against the allurements or discouragements of the world#

2.Continuance in euill maketh children obstinate, and [Note 45] inflexible therein. Elies sonnes being suffered to goe on in wickednesse till they came to ripenesse of yeeres, would not afterwards harken to the voice of their Father. What creature can be tamed, if it be not begun with while it is young?#

3.When children first begin to be capable of instruction [Note 46] they are most pliable to follow the direction of their parents as is euident by the ordinary course of nature in all things Clay, wax, and such other things while they are soft receiue any impression: twigs while they are tender are bowed any way: birds and beasts are easily tamed when they are young: corne sowne betimes bringeth a timely and plentifull haruest.#

4.That which in childhood is learned, is longest retained: [Note 47] Traine vp a childe in the way he should goe, and when he is old he will not depart from it. A vessell longest keepeth that sauour with which at first it is seasoned: and by experience we may note old men best to remember the things which in their childhood they learned: yea by well educating children from their infancy much labour may afterwards be spared: for constant vse of vertue bringeth it vnto a law. [Note 48]#

Obiect. To teach children while they are young, is but as to teach a Parrot or such like vnreasonable creatures: they may learne what is taught them, but they cannot conceiue it.

1.Answ. Though children haue not so deepe an apprehension while they are young, as they haue when they come to riper yeares, yet so soone as they are capable of instruction, they doe much better conceiue what is taught them, then vnreasonable creatures can doe.#

2.Though that were granted, yet it would not thereupon follow, that it is better not to be taught while they are young. For, first it is better that they should be framed and squared to a good course, before they can discerne betwixt good and euill, ⟦G20⟧hen be suffered to runne on in euill, till they get an habit ⟦G21⟧herein; which after it is got, will hardly be cast off. Secondly, by teaching them before they can well conceiue, their apprehension is much helped. What may be the reason that ⟦G22⟧hildren of kings, and great men are commonly of more vnderstanding at#

12.or#

14.yeares of age, then poore and meane ⟦G23⟧ens children at#

17.or#

18.but that they are sooner, and beter instructed? Thirdly, as by age their vnderstanding commeth to more and more ripenesse, they will more and more ⟦G24⟧nceiue that which at first they did not so well vnderstand. Then schollers first learne their Latine rules, they learne them ⟦G25⟧eerely by rote, without vnderstanding the meaning of them, [Note 49] ⟦G26⟧t afterwards come to make very good vse of them. Where ⟦G27⟧ children are to be instructed betimes euen for the benefit at may be after reaped, as corne is sowne in winter to receiue ⟦G28⟧op the haruest following: and to preuent the mischiefes at may fall out, lest they get head ouer their parents against ⟦G29⟧ir minde.#

By the way let mothers especially note this point of timely nurture, as a point in peculiar appertaining to them. The [Note 50] grandmother Lois, and mother Eunice, first taught Timothy, [Note 51] Bathsheba taught Salomon when he was young. Oft doth Salomon warne children [Note 52] not to forsake their mothers teaching.

Whereby he implieth that mothers should teach their children especially while they are young: which duty so belongeth to a mother, as [Note 53] Salomon laieth the blame, and shame of the neglect thereof vpon her: on the other side the honour of well nurturing children redoundeth especially to the mother. To this purpose is it, that the [Note 54] particular names of the mothers of the kings are recorded in Scripture: intimating thereby that mothers were a maine cause of the piety, or impiety of such children. Salomon and Absolom had both one father, but diuers mothers. May we not well thinke that Salomons mothers care to instruct him was an especiall meanes of his piety: and that Absoloms mothers neglect of this duty, was some cause of his impiety? It is expresly noted of Ahaziahs mother, that she was his counseller to doe wickedly, which made him so wicked [Note 55] as he was. Home-experience confirmeth as much: for if father and mother be of diuers religions, most of the children will follow the mother. For while children are young, their mother is most in their sight: she feedeth, she apparelleth them, she tendeth them when they are not well, (when the Shunemites childe being ill, said to his father, my head, my head, he said to his seruant, carrie him to his mother.) Her precepts therefore [Note 56] and practise in that respect are best heeded by the children, and she hath the best opportunity to perswade them to what she liketh best: so as what they learne in their younger yeares, commonly they learne of their mothers: and that which then they learne, for the most part sticketh most close vnto them, and is longest retained by them, as was noted [Note 57] before.

I haue not thus in particular pressed this point vpon mothers, as if I exempted fathers from all care of nurturing their children in the beginning: for in my text the Apostle named Fathers: and Salomon saith, that his father taught him eue⟦G30⟧ while he was tender: and Dauid felt the smart of neglecting hi⟦G31⟧ other children. It is therefore (as hath before beene proued) a ioynt duty belonging to both. Fathers therefore must doe their best endeuour, and see that mothers doe theirs also, because he is a gouernour ouer child, mother, and all.

Contrary is the negligence of most parents, who let the best yeares wherein their children are most docible passe ouer in wantonnesse, vanity, and folly: and so lose that which can neuer be recouered againe, most precious time. Hence is it that when they goe about to reclaime their children, they finde them exceedingly peruerse and head-strong: much like to a strong bigge arme of a tree, which if a man goe about to straiten, he cannot easily make it bow: and though it bow, yet will it not continue to stand as he would haue it: nay it may be that it will rather breake then bow much. Such a branch was Adoniah. It is apparent that in his childhood he was not well nurtured, for his father would not displease him from his childhood. [Note 58]

The fathers putting off this duty to the mother, and the mothers putting it off to the father, is a great cause of the neglect thereof. Were both of them perswaded that it belonged to them both, and in that respect would to their power be helpfull each to other, children would much better be instructed.

As parents must begin betimes to nurture their children, so they must hold on therein, as long as they retaine any gouernment ouer them: yea so long as they remaine to be parents vnto them. Some difference there may be in the manner of performing this duty: for children are to be vsed as children: and they who are growne in yeares, and of riper vnderstanding, accordingly to be dealt withall: yet still must parents haue a care of their well doing. The word vsed in my text and translated Children, is a generall word which in Scripture and other [Note 59] writers is vsed to set forth all sort of children, of what sexe, of what age, of what degree soeuer they be. In handling the duty of children we [Note 60] shewed, that children owed a subiection to parents so long as they liued together: wherefore by the rule of relation, so long also an authority remaineth in parents ouer their children, and accordingly they ought to haue a fatherly care for their good. On this ground Eli did well in admonishing [Note 61] his children after they were maried: his fault was that he went not farre enough in doing his duty: somewhat he did, but not all that he should and might haue done. Iob is commended for the care he had ouer his children when they were growne in yeares: for day by day he sent for them and sanctified them: and that after they had seuerall houses of their owne, and dwelt apart: and this all their daies.

For the performance of that which is now vrged, parents must so carrie themselues from time to time towards their children, as they euer keepe the reines in their owne hands, and [Note 62] retaine a power to curbe their children as they see occasion. They may, as their children grow vp in yeares, slaken the reines more and more, but neuer let them cleane goe, and cast them loose on their childrens necke.

Contrary is their folly who put themselues in their childrens power, and let goe all their authority ouer them. Many [Note 63] parents that haue thus done, hauing by wofull experience found the mischiefe and inconuenience that hath followed thereupon, haue much repented their folly, and vsed meanes of redresse, but all too late. For a mischiefe is much more easily preuented then redressed. All the power that Dauid had could not hold in Absolom after he was permitted to haue [Note 64] horses, and chariots, and men at his command. If Dauid, as he begun, had continued to keepe him within a compasse, and still held him vnder, all the treasonable plots which he put in execution, might easily haue beene preuented. Our times afford too many examples of parents folly in this kinde, and of the mischiefes following thereupon.

Of Time of nurture thus farre. The meanes thereof follow.